Forbidden Love
by roxygirl2456
Summary: "You know I love you. What's it going to take to prove it to you?" I paused then turned around to look at him. He looked like a frightened puppy. I spoke in voice and tone that could have scared President Snow himself. "Kiss me…" Co-Written with Inkspiration. Slash. Don't like, Don't read. Please Review!
1. Nothing Exciting

"School, what's the point of it?"

"Babes,"

"Easy sex,"

"No, babes _and_ easy sex," almost everyone agreed.

"Wrong," I corrected, rubbing my temples, "It's to learn about survival and strategy, for the Games." I wasn't exactly sure why he hung out with these lumbering, sex-craved idiots. "No wonder nobody from this district ever wins!"

I wished I wasn't so popular, and then I could be friends with Dakota; a girl with red hair and a thin, narrow face. Her fox-like features caused many to call her "Foxface." The girl was extremely intelligent for her age, in general was an attractive woman, but I had no desire to, as my "friends" would put, 'Get into her pants.' Their respect for females was extremely low, degrading and childish.

As if on cue, I spotted her walking to her table, her green eyes downcast. "Hey Foxface!" I beckoned. Those green eyes caught my own, "Come here!"

The girl ignored me and made her was back to her lonely table in the back. My "friends" went back to talking about girls, and was forced to listen to them.

Soon enough, the day had ended, and I was glad for it. I only wanted to relax. Walking through the city, power plants on either side of me, the dirty black streets staining my shoes, I thought about the day. Same routine, same idiotic friends with their idiotic jokes.

When I approached my door, a "Marcoo!" in a high pitched voice diverted me from my thoughts. Scooping up my little sister, I said, "Hey my little tulip, how are you?"

"Goood! 'Ow 'bout you?" the two year old asked.

"I'm fine," I answered, putting the little girl down again.

"Jasmine? Where's mommy's necklace?" my mother entered the room, looking around. She spotted me, "Hi Marco, how was your day?"

"Well, and yours?" I asked, kissing her on her cheek.

"It was... well, they don't lie when they call them the 'terrible twos.'" she sighed, pushing her hand through her hair. I grinned, "Well, go up and do your homework," she sighed.

"Okay, mum." The plant had fired my mother a year after Jasmine was born, and it transformed her into a miserable being. She didn't smile as much as before, money was strict, and everything that was hot and new was never acquired by our family. I would just answer my friends with, "I really don't think it's cool," and automatically, it wouldn't be. They believed anything I said. In reality, I couldn't afford it but I didn't need them to know that. They were all in the higher end part of the district. I was not. Though I was their leader, I was much poorer than them. Entering my room, I closed the door and lay on my bed. Why do I have to be popular? I wondered. I'm not arrogant or rude, like I appeared to be at school. I'm pretty polite and shy. Everyone thinks I'm a bad boy or a real rebel. I couldn't lie to my mum about eating my vegetables, much less sneaking out. And my sister, Jasmine, is the world to me. I would always have her back.

I gave her the nick name 'Tulip' since it was her favorite flower. She always wanted to be a tulip, she was only two after all. Only two. When she turned twelve... No, I wouldn't think of that. I loved my mother and sister. My dad? He died when Jasmine was three months old. He had been killed by a "mutt experiment gone wrong". I tried to forget that day. I tried to focus on my homework, but the question would remain unanswered on the crisp white sheet.

"Describe your dream girl," it had sprawled across the paper. The ink was perfect, but it was such a stupid question. A biology question, we were studying the human hormones after all.

I had no dream girl. My dream person was 6'4", blond hair, blue eyes, tanned, muscles everywhere, strong, powerful and male... Yes. I'm gay. I had always wanted a man that had power, was a bit crazy and sexy, very sexy. I tore the paper in half and let the sheet flutter to the carpet. I had always loved men; never women. I wanted a man in my life, but I knew it would never happen. Here, gays would have to become straights so they could have children for working the plants. But I could never really love a woman; I could never trick a woman into loving me. I wish I was a woman, so I could love men. I wished I wasn't popular. I wished I could be friends with Dakota.

"Dinner's ready!"

"Okay, give me one second."


	2. A New Job

I was in a place made out of white clouds. As I looked up, I saw an angel in front of me. Tall, broad and male. He looked almost like my dream guy. I made my way over to him. "Marco…" the word uttered off his tongue like it was the only word he knew. "My love…" I replied. He leaned in and we started to kiss. He kissed me and I kissed him. It felt…magical. Just then I heard an annoying buzzing sound in the back. I ignored it. As it started getting louder and louder, he started to leave. "No don't go…" Finally the buzzing noise got to a point where he covered his ears and almost screamed.

I shot up in my bed. "A dream…" I muttered. It was dream I had had before. Every time I woke up from it, I felt disappointed. I always knew my homosexuality would be hidden from the world but least in my dreams I could be myself and not someone different. I pressed the "off" button on my alarm clock, the source of the buzzing sound. I got out of bed and changed into a plain white button-down shirt, jeans and sneakers. I came down the stairs. "Hey mum," "Hi sweetie!" she said with a smile on her face. "How was your sleep?" "Good, and yours?" "Well enough." I noticed she was cooking bacon. She almost never cooked bacon. Or had huge smiles. "Mom, is there something you want to tell me?" "Well…I have a job interview today!" "No…" "Mind you, it's just selling food produce at the store." I picked up my mum as I hugged her. "That's great…but, what about Jasmine?" "The job interview is not till after you get back so…" "…so you want me to babysit, right?" "Do you mind? "Not at all mum!" "Thanks now eat your breakfast and get to school!"

I arrived at school with a big smile on my face. My mother might get a job! I entered the school and all of my "friends" gathered around me. I saw Dakota at her locker. "See you in class guys!" I said and left. My friends just went back to talking amongst themselves. "Dakota!" She turned around. She was wearing a purple tank top, a flattering colour on her, jeans and flip flops. "Marco, what do you need?" She said with a quick grin at the end. "What's up?" "Many things, for example, the sky. Hovercrafts. Planes." "I meant, how are you?" "I am quite well, and yourself?" "I'm good." She opened her mouth, closed it and then asked a question. "Why are talking to me?" "I want to have conversation that doesn't involve girls, booze and/or sex." "Highly intelligent friends you have there." "Don't get me started!" She laughed at my joke. The bell rang. "Time for class." I said. "It was nice talking to you." She said, smiling at me as she shut her locker then made her way to her homeroom. I smiled too. If I had to choose a girl to marry, it would be her.

"Okay, class, for today's English class we shall be learning about poetry!" Some of the class moaned. Others smirked. I was one of them. I had always loved poetry and had always been good at it. "Now someone give a haiku on the spot…Marco." I stood up, and then began my short Haiku. "As day and night meets, the moon begins its journey, the sun shall go home." "Very good Marco. Can anyone else give me a haiku? Yes, Doña?" Doña was a dirty, sexist pig. This wasn't going to be fun. "Girls, an enchantment, for guys to use when they please, and never turn back…" "Doña! Principal's Office, now!" He smiled as he got out of his desk and walked to the door. He opened it, turned around, winked and left. Nothing would ever change his sexist ways, nothing.

I began my walk home after school immediately. I was looking after Jasmine today. My opened the door to my mother yelling "Where's my necklace?" "Mum I'm home!" My mum came down the stairs, wearing a nice, plain black dress. "You look good" "Thanks! Jasmine's just taking a nap so just do your homework till she wakes up, ok?" "Kay mum."

I went up to my room to start on my homework. "First, English!" 'Write a poem about a girl you like.' I thought about Dakota, but teacher might read mine out loud, I did not need that. So I tore up that piece of paper. "Next, Biology!" 'What's the type of girl you're interested in?' Ripped.

In the end, half of my homework was in the garbage. I sighed. Being gay was a bit hard at times, but I deal with it. I heard Jasmine getting up. "Oh Tulip, Marco Polo is coming to get you!" I heard her giggle's. So sweet, so playful, so innocent! I wished her life would stay that way forever.


	3. Happy

I hadn't expected mom to get a job so quickly. Sure, I mean, she had an interview and all but...I just feel like a retard walking around in school with a grin splitting my face. I'm too happy to talk to my jerky friends, because I know, in some way, they're going to crush my spirits with sex and gay jokes. It really hurts, the gay jokes, the way they talk about gays as if they were aliens. "Gays are a waste of space!" "They don't belong here!" "Hey, Imagine if one of us were a gay! Damn, that would be bad bro!" That's what they say to me. Not TO me but in front of me. It hurts. Because while I'm faking my laughs, and picking at my hands, (God, I have gross hands. They're all bandaged up from picking at them when I'm nervous) I'm actually killing each and every one of them in my head.

Very, _very_ slowly.

So the first person I want to talk to is the lovely Dakota. She's smart and will actually support me. As I walk through the hallways, I find myself bumping into Lonan.

Damn it all.

Lonan is probably the worst guy ever. He's the meanest person I know. He's tall and skinny as a skeleton, but somehow has the strength to bully kids into suicide. And...he's my friend.

And, okay, I admit it. He's super sexy. Not like my dream guy, which I've described, but more like...a dark haired, skinny version of him. He has longer hair that he flips a lot. When he does that, it turns me on. He does have stunning blue eyes that I love though.

"Why so happy?" he asked, shoving his hands deep into his pockets and smirking at me. I'm not going to deny him anything, because I know that'll just screw me over even more. "My mother got a job," I answer quietly, scratching the back of my dark hair. "Oh, that's nice," he shrugged, "Your dad died right? You're poor? So then that's good I guess?" he asked, a sarcastic grin spreading across his face. God, I want to sucker punch this kid. Before I can reply with a snarky comeback, my vision travels to familiar red hair. "Hey, I gotta go talk to my girl!" I say. I know it's stupid, me trying to pass off as straight, but it's the safe way to survive in society. Lonan nods and grins, flipping me off, which I return. "Dumbass," he called out. "Ya little shit!" I replied back. See, the way to be "friends" with another dude is to act like you hate them.

But I'm not acting.

"Dakota," I call out, walking up to her. She turns around, her sharp features scanning me. God, she's intimidating.

"Yes, Marco?" she asks in an equally as sharp voice. "I, uh...my mom. She got a job," I whispered, watching a beam fit onto her freckled face. "Marco! That's awesome!" "Yeah…um…would you...like to help me babysit tonight?" I ask uncertainly. So when she answers "Yes," I let myself hug her. It's the first time I've done so in forever.

Jasmine is giggling like mad, pulling Foxface's hair. The redhead shows no sign of annoyance, but she's laughing too, watching Jasmine try to feed me a cookie at the same time. Grinning, I bite into it, and she yells out a "hey!" in annoyance, leaving Dakota's arms and trotting over to me, poking me in the cheek. "That's not funny Marcoo!" Dakota smiled even brighter. Besides the fact the reaping is tomorrow, I can easily say, this is one of the happiest days of my life.


	4. Movie Date

Chapter 4: Movie

After we had put Jasmine to bed, Dakota was getting ready to leave. "Bye Marco…" she said with a weak smile. She started to leave. "Wait!" I called out. She turned around. "Maybe you want to…I don't know…watch a movie?" "Sure. No homework anyways, right?" She said with a smile. "What movie?" I asked as she walked over to our Television, something every family had in Panem. The only reason, of course, was for the Hunger Games. "How about this one? It says 1999, that's…" she started to think about the answer. "A fucking long time ago!" I said. Dakota giggled at my answer. "Yea…I guess you could say that. Stupid…" she muttered at the end of her sentence. "Hey!" She giggled again. "Hey, I'll go and make popcorn and you get the movie ready, ok?" I said. "As long as the task laid out in front of you isn't too difficult for a ijit like yourself." "What?" I yelled back. 'What the hell is an ijit?' I thought. "Here, I'll dumb it down. Is making popcorn too hard for Marco-Polo?" Dakota said in a baby voice. I ignored her. "Whatever!" She started to laugh. "Ignoring you now!" I yelled to her.

The movie was a bit boring, considering that Dakota fell asleep not even halfway through. I had decided to let her sleep till the movie was over. She could use some sleep, the reaping was tomorrow. Everyone from 12 to 18 years of age in District 5 was nervous. District 5 had more victors than say District 12, but still, most victors came from 1, 2 or 4. I felt it wasn't fair, that 1, 2 and 4 had the upper hand, that they had Careers. Other districts had people like me and my 'friends', just there, very unskilled. Dakota would have a good chance though, I thought as I looked over at her. She was extremely intelligent, was quick and nimble and had good reflexes. I heard a loud noise. I looked up from Dakota's face, but it was only from the movie. One fault that she had was that wasn't a light sleeper.

One of the main characters, Alexis, was sitting a table silently as her husband, David, walked in. They started talking. I looked back at Dakota and grinned. She started to shiver and cuddle with me. I put my arm around her and smiled. She was sweet. I looked up back at the movie. I did a double take. A young man, unnamed, had just walked in after fixing a boat(I think), shirtless. Damn this guy was sexy. I already had thought the guy was hot and now here he was, shirtless. He started talking. I was mesmerized. His voice, which I had not noticed until now, had this rasp to it. This was hottie and a half. I was getting turned on by a dead guy, nice. That Alexis girl gave him back his shirt, and I almost whimpered. 'A tighter shirt would be nice…' I thought.

Not until the end did I pay attention much. I kept holding Dakota, listening for Jasmine, and watching for mother. Then at the end, after David's wife had died, he started to strip down to go for swim. I bit my lip and held my breath. 'If it had been that young guy…' I thought. My imagination started to take over. I tried not to let my mind drift and paid attention to movie. David was now kissing some person. They turned around and broke the kiss. '….…' It was the young man. Gay kissing…on a movie? They…they pretend to be straight…or gay? What…Whoa. That's when the movie ended. I blinked. They had just kissed and it was like it was nothing. Was it like straight kissing back then? Why couldn't I live back then? I could be happy. Be freely gay. Foxface woke up. "I'm sorry for falling asleep…Marco?" She said. "…Be freely…?" "Marco!" she said louder. I woke up from my trance. "Sorry. Just…didn't see that ending coming" I noticed something, her hand was on mine. She removed it, quite quickly I might add. "I better get going…you know, reaping." "Yea…" She left after that. My thoughts went to him shirtless, to the gay kiss, to Dakota and her reaction, to the reaping, then back to him shirtless. 'So hot…' I thought. Of course, I was thinking about the man, but then I starting thinking about Dakota. What had just happened?

If anyone reads this story, would you please review? It kills me to see people reading and no reviews. Also, if anyone knows what movie it is, PM me and I'll give you a virtual cookie!

Please review!

Carrie!


	5. Reaping

My mom's eyes look dull, sad. She scoops me into a hug and kisses my head, rasping out "Good luck."

We've gotten a lot of Tesserae this year.

I pull Jasmine into my arms, kiss her forehead without a word and turn to the mirror. They exit the room. I feel a bit angry towards them, though I shouldn't. It's not their fault they can't be in the Hunger Games and I have to. And Jasmine might have to as well. I finish cleaning myself up and take in some surroundings. I have about an hour until the Reaping. I guess I can take a walk or something, but I'm unsure if I really want to leave the comfort of my home. The outside seems scarier than usual, with the Peacekeepers and all. It puts on the cover that it's "protected," while the protectors are the largest threat.

Still, it'd be nice to get some fresh air and clear my head.

My whole walk consists of avoiding the suspicious glares from Peacekeepers and jumbling my thoughts between "Why can't I be born in the Oriental region?" and "Why am I not nineteen years old?" until the Reaping starts. Now I'm pact-tight in the crowd of 12-18 year olds, shifting nervously and feeling way too hot, way too scared. I'm hardly focused as I stare at Mortrisha, our escort and just hoping, hoping it's not me. She's strange looking, with short black and white hair, lots of dark, looming make-up and relatively eerie attire. She's the closest normal escort- normal for the districts at least -and everyone likes her.

Presumably, I like her.

Then I hear the call of Dakota Nicholls.

Then I hear nothing as my frightened eyes find Foxface making her sly way up the stage. She slinks up with a half-smirk, as if she planned this. Not even her eyes give away any signs of fear. I guess that may be why no one volunteers.

So when I hear my name call out, I hardly realize it. My mother lets out a piercing scream, and I hear the blurry call of, "Marco? Is there a Marco Parks out here?" I feel a pat on my back and hear, "That's you."

That's me.

I stumble up the stairs, nowhere near as smooth as Dakota had. I'm hardly aware of a video playing and Mortrisha's dark voice mumbling something before I find myself shaking my best friend's hand. As I am lead towards the Justice Building, I let out a shaky voice, saying: "Where's a trash can?" which I am led to before I puke up what was my small breakfast.

My mom walks in the waiting room, crying her eyes out. I hardly realize what's happening- it's all too surreal. She wraps me in her arms, spewing out, "It'll be okay, you're coming back, it's okay."

I wrap my arms around her as well and nod, "I'll be fine, ma." I know I won't though. I have no experience with weapons, am not very smart and the thought of killing Dakota alone...

I try not to cry. I pick up Jasmine and look her in her confused eyes.

"I'll be gone for a while baby, but, I'll be back. I promise." I know I'm lying. It kind of breaks my heart when she lifts her tiny hand and touches my face. A peacekeeper enters the room, dragging my family away.

God damn it.

"Lonan?" I said with confused look on his face. I sure had expected HIM to come. "Hey Marco…are you…ok?" Lonan said. I had never seen him at a loss for words. He was always cool and calm. "I'm about to be send away to my death…I'm doing just peachy." I said. He had yet to look at me. "Same sarcastic Marco…I'm going to miss that." He was going miss me? I thought he hated me like I hated him. "I don't hate." Shit was I thinking out lough again? "I can't hate you...you're too amazing too hate." I looked at him. Was this a joke? Had he found out I was gay and was trying to break down my walls to trample me? "What?" was my only responds. "Look. This may come as a shocker to you but…I like you...in way I don't think I'm supposed to..." I stiffened. Did he just say what I think he said? "You have a…crush on me?" "I didn't want to admit it, but yea. I've got a crush on you." "So your gay then…?" I asked. "No. I still like woman, but I also like guys. There is a name for someone who likes both genders though." I couldn't answer. Never in my wildest dream had I thought Lonan liked me. "I'm bi. I, Lonan, am bi-sexual." "When?" "When what?" he asked. "When did figure out you were bi?" "I guess a couple years back…back when we became friends." I gasped. I couldn't help it. Lonan was bi, and had a crush on me. Just now I realized that Lonan was closer to me…and checking me out. "You really are a catch, you know that?" I gulped. "Now you know why I bully…" He sat down on one of the chairs. I remembered something now. Lonan never bullied before he had become my friend. When he found out he was bi, he didn't want people bullying him about it so he beat them to it. "And to think, I thought you bullied because you were an ass." He laughed. Then he looked in to my eyes for the first time. Normally, they looked cocky or sneaky but now, they were filled with _ (I need a word, please fill it in). He walked over to me. "I hope I get to see you soon." He said. I started picking at my hands. This was the closest I had ever been to boy…correction, a cute guy. Lonan had his hair in his eyes; a hairstyle a found looked cute on him and was wearing a plain pair of jeans, black sneakers and a white polo shirt. Plain but hot. Very hot. He had moved my hands so that I stopped picking at them then cupped his hand over my left cheek. "What are you…?" "Just go with it." He said. He then leaned in and closed the gap between us, kissing me. My first kiss…with Lonan. The guy I thought I hated, who acted like a total and ass, who I thought was sexy…was kissing me. I wasn't going to say he was a bad kisser. I started to close my eyes and put one of my hands behind his head, pushing him closer. The other hand grabbed his waist. If this was my first kiss, it would be great kiss. His hand that was on my cheek stayed there while his other hand went under shirt and made its way up my back. He pushed me up against the wall, moving his hand from my back to my stomach. He traced my barely defined abs, if you would even call them that. I opened my mouth a little bit, and he stuck his tongue in my mouth. I had to fight the urge to moan. I put my tongue in his mouth and he groaned. He moved his hands, my cheek now feeling cold, as he began un-do the buttons on my shirt. I must have flinched because he broke the kiss. He looked at me with a look of slight regret, but mostly of sexual wants. He took a step back. With both of my hands I grabbed each side of his face and pulled him back in to continue what he had started. He continued with my buttons, while I had started biting his neck. "I never knew…that you… liked men." He stated. "There's a lot you don't know about me." I whispered in his ear. He finally finished with my buttons as I tore his own shirt off. I will admit once and only once, but I, Marco Parks, thought Lonan Donovan was beautiful. He might have been skinny, but he still had muscles in all the right places. I noticed he was checking out my body. It wasn't that well defined. I barely had any muscles but somehow he still managed to like what he saw. "You've got 2 minutes!" We both jumped at the voice. I looked back at Lonan, before pressing him to the wall, kissing him. "Do you promise not to tell anyone about this?" I asked. "Why would I? If you don't, I won't." He mumbled. He put his forehead to mine. Then we spread ourselves apart. He pulled his shirt back on while buttoned mine back up. He looked back at me. He walked over and put his hand on my cheek. "Don't let anybody change you. If you come back, I want you the same Marco as you are today." I nodded. He moved closer to my ear and whispered, "Keep save, be brave and remember who you are." He put something in my hand. "Times up, Get out." A peacekeeper yelled as they opened the door. Thank God we didn't continue with our kissing. "Bye Marco" Lonan said and with that, he left. The door shut. I looked to see what he placed in my hand. In it was what looked like a bracelet with two words engraved on it. "Don't Change". I put the bracelet on.

I bring my hands to my lips after I fasten on the bracelet, thinking of my first kiss. It was at least nice to have someone give me that chance before I'm sent off to my death. I feel as if I've had another accomplishment in life, as self-absorbed as that sounds. I only wish Lonan had told me sooner.

Soon, I meet the sly green eyes of Foxface, her gaze almost frightening. Her thin eyebrows are low. I try to smile at her, but she whips her head away from me, quickly slinking into the train. I take a deep breath, and follow suite.


End file.
